Incest Survivors: You Don't Have to Do Family Holidays

*This article discusses a topic that may be upsetting to some readers.* Peace, joy, and holiday cheer. They're holiday season ideals we all seem to aspire to, or conspire to, though they often do not represent our familial truth. In childhood, many of us were taught to see the holiday season as a perfect, untouchable time of fantasy and nostalgia. The truth is, though, this time of forced family socialization is absolutely dreadful for people who were sexually assaulted by family members. Because secrecy, shame, and accommodation are the pillars of incest in a family, many survivors plan to participate in family gatherings, despite the fact that their abuser(s) will be there as well. How

Relationship Problems? This is Probably Why.

One of the most common complaints I hear in my medical practice is the issue of relationship dissatisfaction. People spend hour upon hour, and dollar upon dollar, trying to figure out how to be happy when partnered with others. People do the same when it comes to relating to their children. And some of the most bitter conflict I've ever witnessed has been between adult siblings. What's the deal with all this struggle? Where does the conflict come from, and what can be done about it? Researchers, mental health professionals, self-help gurus, and spiritual advisors offer us a wealth of relationship resources. There are hundreds of books, theories, websites, and blogs dedicated to the art o

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